


Sons and Lovers

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-26
Updated: 2007-12-26
Packaged: 2019-05-31 08:22:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15115532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: She had that power...she could bring him back from the brink with just a touch.  Toby hoped she would only ever use her powers for good.





	Sons and Lovers

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

His phone rang at 6:45 as he was sitting in the living room talking to Ellie. Her mother was in the kitchen preparing dinner. They would be eating tonight on lovely real oak TV trays that had been part of Charlie and Zoey’s Christmas gift to her older sister. Little Ellie, hazel eyes aglow, regaled Toby with stories of her pre-kindergarten adventures. Dora the Explorer Saves Christmas played from the DVD player thought it was almost March. The four year old did not care…it was one of her favorites.

“Hold on just a second Ellie.” Toby pulled the phone from his hip. “I have to answer this. Hello.”

“Hello Toby, its Andi.”

“Hi.”

“I guess I don’t have to beat around the bush with the niceties.”

“Still, asking me how I am goes a long way. Even if you don’t care.”

“Who is that Toby?” the child asked.

“Hold on sweetie; I'm on the phone.” He stood up. “I’ll be right back. Finish watching your movie.”

Ellie nodded, turning her attention back to the television. Toby walked to the powder room and though he tried, could not see what Ellie was doing in the kitchen from his vantage point. He closed the powder room door.

“Where are you?” Andi asked.

“I'm with friends and I can't talk right now.”

“Well I need to talk to you.”

“Are the kids alright?”

“They're fine.”

“I will call you when I get home later. Maybe around ten or so.”

“Molly isn’t coming tomorrow.” Andi blurted out. Her tone sounded triumphant but Toby just let it pass. She would not bait him tonight. “But I guess we can talk about that later.”

“Yeah. Goodbye Andi.”

Toby flipped the phone closed and went back into the living room. Ellie was setting up dinner so Toby sat back on the couch.

“This looks excellent Ellie.”

“Just a little something…barbecued chicken, scalloped potatoes, and green beans. Is the background music to your liking?”

“Vintage Dora is good any time of the year.” Toby replied.

She smiled, sitting down next to him. Her daughter was content to sit too close to the television. Ellie promptly told her to move back.

“The rays will sear your eyeballs.” She said.

“No way!” the four year old replied. 

“Seriously. It’s happened to kids before.”

“Has it Toby?” little Ellie looked at him.

“There are documented cases in Wisconsin and California.”

That was enough to move her back. She loved Dora and Boots but she loved her eyes a little bit more.

“Is everything alright?” Ellie asked.

“That was Andi on the phone.”

She nodded but said little else. The meal was delicious and Toby told her so. They relaxed, watching television and just enjoying the evening together.

***

Ellie was in bed by eight o’clock. While her mother read her a story and tucked her in, Toby cleaned. He put the dinner dishes in the dishwasher, poured two glasses of wine, and found The Best of Our Lives on cable. When Ellie returned she wore a pair of flannel pajamas. She immediately found her way into his arms and the cuddling began. Toby smiled, holding her close and inhaling the scent of Vera Wang Sheer Veil.

“I can hardly believe how good you always smell.” He said, kissing her.

“Well, you are my boyfriend now so I at least have to impress you.”

“It would probably be next to impossible for me not to be impressed by you, Dr. Bartlet.”

“Sweet talker.” Ellie stroked his beard.

“I am. You have to make me stop.”

“Oh no.” she shook her head. “When you get going I definitely prefer that you don’t stop.”

“Eleanor…”

They were kissing when his phone buzzed again. They lay so close together, Ellie could feel it against her own hip and it made her giggle. Toby groaned when he saw the display. He opened the phone, sitting up on the couch.

“I'm not home yet. I will call you when I get there. I didn’t forget.”

“Well where are you?” Andi asked.

“Why are you asking me these kinds of questions? What is going on? Are you spoiling for a fight because I have to tell you I am not in the mood, I am with friends and the last time I checked things were OK with us? Don’t do this right now.”

“Are you with Eleanor Bartlet?”

“Yes.”

“When were you going to share this development with me?”

“I didn’t know I had to call you when I decided to get a life. You haven’t even told me that you're engaged yet. I read it in the Washington Post. Congratulations, by the way.”

“I'm out of town for work tomorrow so I need to get some rest. I can't wait up for you to get home Toby.”

“What time is your flight?” Toby asked.

“Five.”

“I will call you at two thirty. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

Closing the phone, Toby tried his best not to flip out completely. Ellie sat up, stroking the back of his head before she wrapped her arms around his middle. Toby took deep breaths, trying to come down from wherever he was. She pulled him closer so that his back pressed on her breasts. He dipped his head; Ellie kissed the nape of his neck. She had that power… she could bring him back from the brink with just a touch. Toby hoped she would only use her powers for good. They were both quiet for a while. He moved his hand over her, his fingers between hers.

“I'm OK.” He spoke quietly.

“You are not, and you never have to pretend to be with me.”

“I should not let my ex-wife get to me. Especially when I'm here with you Ellie.”

“Shh.” She kissed his neck again. “Just try to relax and let it go. You are only human you know; she knows how to press your buttons.”

Dammit, Toby hated that she could still do that to him. She didn’t even deserve being able to piss him off. It was still a head game; was Andi doing it all on purpose?

“Maybe I should just go. Yeah, that might be better. I am lousy company right now.”

With more reluctance than ever, he extracted himself from her embrace and stood. Ellie looked at him as she slid her foot under her buttocks.

“I would prefer if you didn’t.” she said. “We don’t get much alone time and I hate letting Andi ruin it for us.”

“I know but…”

“C’mere. I bet if you let me hold you, even for just a little while, you will feel so much better.”

He couldn’t resist the possibility. Toby let her take him to that very warm place. He lay in her arms, head on her chest. They fit together like two puzzle pieces and soon enough Toby was sure their breaths came at the same velocity. He stole a few kisses, which led to a nice make out session. Making out at 57; God it was wonderful. 

He liked kissing her. He liked the sounds Ellie made, the way her breath hitched or she sighed. He would touch her; just enough to make her hot, and then he would stop. Ellie groaned, taking his hands in hers and kissing him hard. Toby upped the stakes. He unbuttoned two buttons on her top, kissing the warm skin. She arched her back.

“Toby…Toby…”

“I know, we should probably stop.” He replied, making no effort to do so. In his defense, she didn’t either. She had not even suggested it.

Ellie pulled him into a tight hug, not wanting to let him go.

“Actually,” she whispered. “I want to tear all of your clothes off and make hot, passionate love. That’s the best indication that its time to stop.”

“I am unable to properly follow that logic. Hot, passionate love sounds good.”

Ellie laughed; her arms came down from around his neck. She sat up on her elbows, smiling when he kissed her.

“Alright, I will go. I have to catch the train anyway. My living in Brooklyn keeps you out of a lot of trouble, Dr. Bartlet.”

Toby got up from the couch and ready to leave. Ellie fixed her pajama top, joining him by the front door.

“It’s raining out Toby. I can give you an umbrella if you'd like.”

“I’ll be fine.” He assured her.

“What is with men’s total non-belief in umbrellas?”

“Simple answer, we’re dumb. Also, I don’t think non-belief is a word.”

“It is so…shut up.” She kissed his nose. “Just give me a call when you are home safely, alright?”

She had never asked before and hearing the request made Toby feel good. He pulled her into a hug.

“I will. Ellie?”

“Yes?”

Toby opened his mouth to speak but words didn’t come. Nothing happened and the former Communications Director furrowed his brow in frustration. Ellie stroked his face.

“Go. I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah.”

Nodding, he kissed her once more and left. She locked up, leaning on the door for a few minutes. If he would have said it…he was not ready to say it. Toby had spent so much of his life bottling up his feelings, good and bad. It would take a while before they could get through the intricate web weaved inside of him and out to her. Ellie was in no rush though she was well aware of what she was feeling.

Never in her life had she fallen in love so quickly. Even her first love at 12, Jeremy Spencer, was a slow building simmer that took a year to develop. He played violin next to her viola in the school orchestra. What was meant to be will always be. Her mother used to tell her that. The time would be right and they would say it. It would be wonderful, nothing about it rushed or insincere. Ellie smiled, going to her bedroom to work some before bed.

***

Toby taught classes from 10am to noon, and then held office hours from 12:30 to 2. On most Fridays, the place was deserted. If students had questions, they would ask them on days that didn’t precede weekends. But with midterms over the next two weeks, a few stragglers made it into his office. By 2:15, the door was closed. He had a bottle of Coke, a corned beef special with extra slaw, and a bag of rippled potato chips. Toby took a deep breath, let it out, and called Andi.

“Hello.”

“Hi Andi. Why isn’t Molly coming?”

“I thought you would have talked to her by now.”

“Why? You just told me about this last night and she is in school right now.”

“I told her to call you days ago. She does not want to hurt you of course, but she is at that age Toby. She has a lot of friends; she likes sleepovers and going to the mall. I told her that seeing her was important to you but sometimes children can be selfish.”

Not just children, Toby thought, biting into his sandwich.

“All that matters to me is that she is happy.” He said. “I miss Molly and I want to talk to her. I think I will take the train down in the middle of the week and take her to dinner.”

“They will be with my parents while I'm away.”

“Alright.”

Great, Toby thought. It’s been a while since I've felt a cattle prod up my ass. Kaye will know just what to do about that. After a bit of silence, Andi cleared her throat.

“Huck and I had a long talk.”

“I figured as much.”

“He was articulate but adamant in his wants and needs.”

“I think he may have a better vocabulary than I have.” Toby replied, trying to lighten the mood.

“How long have you been seeing Ellie Bartlet?” Andi asked.

“Since mid-December. I was not keeping it a secret, so don’t assume that.”

“What shall I assume then?”

“That we don't talk much and when we do, our personal lives rarely factor into the conversation.”

“Is this thing serious?”

“Please don’t sound so incredulous Andi, as if it is impossible for a woman to find me interesting.”

“She always was the moody one.”

“Just stop it. You don’t even know her.”

“I'm sure you know her very well.” Andi sighed. “She is young enough to be your daughter.”

Toby bit down on his lip so that what was on his mind would not come out of his mouth.

“We are not going to have a conversation about my personal life, ever. I don’t talk to you about Roger so don’t talk to me about Ellie. Can we get back to Huck please?”

“I told him I wanted to think about it. I told him that having him move from home would be hard for me. As I said, he was adamant. I gave in.”

“He's coming to New York?” Toby could hardly believe what he was hearing. It had to be a dream.

“While I am not entirely sure it is the best idea, it will be impossible to talk him out of it. Huck has a stubborn streak and is quite attached to you.”

“I'm his father; of course he is attached to me.”

“You will need to enroll him in school.” She said as if he never spoke. “I will fax all the information you need when I return from my trip. I would prefer it not be public school but I will let you make that decision. School ends here on June 13th. I will send he and Molly around July 4th like I always do.”

“Andi, I…this means everything to me. Being able to have him with me is more than I could have hoped. I'm just glad this did not have to become a point of contention for us. I am glad for Huck’s sake.”

“As much as I want to hold onto him, I know that I cannot.” Andi replied. “Keeping my relationship with him intact is essential. There is validity to much of what he said to me…boys need their fathers. Being a single parent is not easy though.”

“We will be fine.” Toby replied, cutting her off before she could put on her syrupy tone to remind him one by one of his shortcomings. “Shall I send him to Baltimore every other weekend?”

“Yes, though I am sure as he gets older the lure of Manhattan will beat out visiting mom. So this is what happens Toby? We are going to split our kids up by gender?”

“That was never my intent. I wanted us to be a family…I never asked for this. All four of us are dealing with a lot.”

“You knew we were never going to be a family.” She said sighing.

“No Andi, when you laid down with me and asked me to make love to you, I didn’t think…did you think I would just walk away from my kids. If you did, then why did you choose me? Anyone could’ve gotten you pregnant. Because it didn’t take me long to figure out that the children were the only thing you wanted out of the equation.”

“I ask myself the same thing sometimes.”

“You don't even care how much you hurt me, do you? I want Molly in my life as much as I want Huck. I just want to love my kids because no matter how they came to be, they're here.”

“Well, you cannot have both of my children!” Andi exclaimed, her composed façade slipping.

“They belong to the both of us. For nine years, I have lived by your schedule with little complaint and I miss so damn much of their lives. All I want is my chance to be a father and I don’t want my kids growing up thinking I didn’t want to be there. I want what I never had with my old man. We are not enemies Andi, and if we are now its not my fault.”

“Huck will be on the four o’clock train out of Baltimore so expect him at Penn Station around six. He tells me that you are introducing him to the fundamentals of Judaism.”

“Yeah. They should both know where they come from.”

“Molly wants to be baptized Lutheran. My mother and I think it’s a good idea.”

“I implore you, please, don’t let Kaye do anything until I talk to Molly.”

“Sure.” Andi replied.

Toby did not believe her at all. This was payback and he would have to take it. He sighed.

“I have to go Toby; I don’t want to hold up the plane.”

“Have you and Roger set a wedding date?” he asked.

“No. Goodbye Toby.”

“Bye.”

He hung up, finishing his lunch before the gravity of the situation set in. His son would come to live with him and his daughter was slowly pulling away. Andi did not want him to be Huck and Molly’s father…that hurt the most. He loved those kids more than anything. The circumstance of how they came into the world and the relationship between their parents was not their fault. He would keep trying with Molly; never give up on having something special with his daughter.

Toby took his cell phone from his hip, opening it and pressing three. It rang four times before going to voicemail.

‘You’ve reached Dr. Eleanor Bartlet. Please leave a message. Thank you.’

BEEP! “Hey, its Toby. Andi and I talked and the world did not explode in flames. I know; I am as surprised as you. Call me when you get some time. Huck is coming this weekend but we are just hanging around. Hope to talk to you soon. Bye.”

***

“I was just cornered by a group of ninjas but managed to kick each and every one of their asses. Did they think something as simplistic as nunchuks would matter when faced with my fury? No one corners the Master.”

“I am not even going to ask. Alright, yes I am. What are you talking about?”

“Solitaire Shaolin. It’s a computer game I like to play. You create your own fighting master and then play against the computer in different environments and at different player levels. I've gotten pretty good at it. Scoff, its alright, I did at first. After a stressful or boring day though, it relaxes me. Like a bubble bath might do for you.”

“I hate bubble baths.” Ellie said. “I like baths but not bubbles. Was your day stressful?”

“Not really. Huck watched TV, wrote, and played games, the normal stuff. He said if he was coming to live with me then I didn’t have to find ways to entertain him. We did have breakfast out after Temple. He really wants you to come next time he’s in town.”

“If you're comfortable with that then so am I. Is he coming to live with you?”

“Andi and I talked and um, yeah. It was a hard conversation but I got through it. Have you ever felt used, Ellie?”

“By you?” she asked.

“No, of course not. I mean by someone you love, or someone you thought you loved?”

“Yes, I think everyone has. I think only the people we love can do that to us. For some people you would do just about anything.”

“I won't ever, ever do that to you.” He said.

“Be careful slugger, I'm recording this conversation.”

“I'm serious Ellie.”

“I know that. You don’t have to make me any promises about your intentions. Actions speak louder than words every time. I don’t think people always do that kind of thing on purpose.”

“That is where our opinions differ. I think almost every move someone makes is calculated.”

“No wonder you don’t smile more.”

They were quiet for a while. Toby coughed.

“I thought I could come by and see you and Ellie after I take Huck to the train station tomorrow. How about pizza?”

“As long as its white pizza with chicken and ranch dressing.” She said.

“How about two pizzas?”

Ellie laughed.

“Yeah, lets do that.”

“I need to talk to you about some things.” Toby said.

“Is something wrong?”

“Nope. I just want to talk. I wish I could come over now but Huck is sound asleep.”

“So is Ellie. Tomorrow is good; anytime is good.”

“Anytime? Anyplace?”

“You are going down a dirty road I think, Professor Ziegler.”

“No, I'm just asking a question.”

“No…” Ellie laughed again.

“You have such a lovely laugh. I really like it.”

“It sucks that I can't kiss you after you say things like that.”

“I will remind you tomorrow.” He said.

“I'm sure you will. Toby, I am growing very fond of you.”

“But?”

“But what?”

“C'mon, you know that that statement is always followed by a but. Something along the lines of ‘but your breath stinks’ or ‘but your clothes never match’.”

“Your clothes are just fine.” Ellie replied laughing. “Everything about you is fine and I wanted to tell you so.”

“There are some things I want to tell you too.”

“I'm listening.”

“Not now.”

“That’s not fair.”

“We will talk tomorrow, about everything. I promise.”

“Alright…I won't push you.”

“Its OK sometimes, to push. I have a tendency to be stationary without a little help.”

“I wouldn’t say that. You’re too hard on yourself Toby. You are just fine you know. Go back to being a master and tell Huck I said hello.”

“Yeah. Goodnight Eleanor.”

“It would be even better if you were here instead of there.”

“See, I try to let you go and its damn near impossible.”

“Alright, we will try another way…hang up on the count of three.”

“1, 2; that doesn’t work for me. I will just say goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

His cell phone beeped with the sound of Ellie disconnecting. Toby closed his cell phone, putting it on the desk beside him. He went back to his computer game but was distracted by thoughts of the woman in his life. Yeah, they would talk tomorrow. Toby wanted to feel these feelings; know that things were on the way to wonderful. There was something in the put of his stomach that was stopping him though and he needed to know what that was.

***

Ellie made one last phone call before she went to sleep. She pressed five on her cell phone hoping she was not waking anyone.

“Hello.”

“Zoey, did I wake you?”

“Uh uh, I was reading. What's happening?”

“I need to talk about some things; I need a good ear. Do you have some time to listen?”

“Of course I do. Is everything alright?”

“Brace yourself little sis; this one is a whopper.”

***


End file.
